Words by Dan Rutberg., arranged with Fredric Sedgewick Lumina
Key: E Major (classic blues key)
Tempo: Slow shuffle, ~68 bpm
Time Signature: 12/8 swing

[Verse 1]

Woke up this mornin’, sheets wrapped ‘round my knees,
Sweat like a sinner prayin’ hard for release.
Rolled to the left—snap!—rolled to the right—crack!
Every joint I own just whispered, “We ain't comin' back.”

[Chorus]

Got those God I hope I don’t break a hip geriatric blues,
Tryin’ to two-step in my orthopedic shoes.
My lover’s gone, the bed’s too wide,
Glaciers melting, forests on fire—damn nowhere to hide.
And I may be limpin’, but I’ll never lose—
These God I hope I don’t break a hip… geriatric blues.

Bridge (spoken first, then sung)
(Elvis-style drawl)
Mmm…
There was a time I danced all night,
With a woman who burned like June.
Now I fumble for my reading light,
And howl for my lost loves at the moon…

(sung)
So don’t you laugh at these orthopedic shoes,
I once shook the world with these dancin’ moves!
But now my hips got the rhythm of bad evening news…
Got them geriatric blues, baby—don’t make me choose
Between love, memory…
and Metamucil.

[Final Verse]

Now the mirror don’t lie, and neither does the scale,
My six-pack’s retired, now it’s more like a pail.
But I still got a spark, buried deep in these bones,
And a heart that won’t quit—just grumbles and groans.

[Chorus – Repeat with Soul]

Got those God I hope I don’t break a hip geriatric blues,
Tryin’ to two-step in my orthopedic shoes.
Yeah, my baby’s gone, and the world’s askew,
But I still hum her name when the night breaks through.
And I may be limpin’, but I’ll never lose—
These God I hope I don’t break a hip… geriatric blues.